So life goes on, and we pretend that everything is okay. How else can we live, how else can we face our tomorrows, yesterdays. the ghosts from failures past, failures in the future or the current failure to foresee the failure to be. How else can we continue but pretend. This is faith, pretending what is as if it isnt. So life goes on,we smile, we laugh, we dance, with heavy hearts,  constrained souls. This is life, this is how we know it to be. I will wake up again and i will say i believe and will pretend to act like i believe, this is faith. Trying by all means to be what the word says, and yet there is a battle inside that yearns for the opposite. A hard feeling inside, an almost immovable force within me. I will wake up and i will try again. maybe by faith as the word says, i will defeat my inner man, i will raise above things that don't matter and look upon that which does, so maybe,just maybe i won't have to pretend but be that which i was created to be, not the self i have developed, but that which is required of me. So life goes on, with its joys, sorrows, pains, and expectations. and i continue and pretend, with the hope this pretence would be something more real.